Halfway through the month and now I am panicking. I learned of the topics of the next few challenges and I am scared as I do not have an answer to most of them. Just like this one…
Who is a blogger that you admire?
Did you experience ever doing something without knowing what that something is all about?
Like diving into a pool without knowing how to swim?
Or perhaps eating something without realizing it is made of something as unconventional as wood worm?
Maybe like when you had your very first haircut?
Or the very first day at school?
That was blogging for me.
For my fascination for movies, art, literature, and many others, I spent a good time sitting by the bleachers and watching the boys play until I find myself watching a specific player and telling myself “Oh, that one is good.” Then after that, I build up the courage to play along and then did.
When I started to blog, I just did.
Although this blog is my third attempt, never did I thought of building up my fascination for it. I did not actively sought out blogs to read until I knew what I was looking for in one.
It is just now that I am zealous in communicating with other blogs as I am serious about this one now. I have not celebrated my first monthsary yet, so as sad as it may sound, I am not admiring any blogger. Yet.
It sounds so selfish and cruel, does it not?
Here I am, just blogging and blogging without actually having any other person in my field to look up to. I just realized how selfish that sounds. It is in between the lines of “I don’t look up to people. People look up to me” and “I am just careless so I just did it”.
Do not get me wrong. There are blogs that I find outstanding. There are times when I read a blog entry that I would curse to myself in my head and wished that I have thought of what he did. Then there are times that I would read a blog entry and be so engrossed in what he was talking about that by the time that I reach the comment section, I would compose my thoughts first before I write as my comment could be another entry all on itself. Then, there are those virtual slow clap-worthy blogs too.
But I have not found my “He stands out so I follow him wherever he goes” blog yet.
I actually thought to search for a great blog for the past few days and post him as the blog that I admire. But then, I don’t lie here. And I have no plans on starting.
I wished that I sat by the blogging bleachers first before I started to join the community. Perhaps, I was so excited that I forgot. Perhaps, I deliberately forgot about it. I don’t know.
Forgive me for my foolishness and assumed narcissism.